aites, it weird y i'm still feelin this way coz i shouldnt be as i should have accepted tat fact long time ago. but actually i dun think i have. so much things reminds mi of her especially jay chou. n the fact tat no one actually knows y she did it sucks more.

look thru frenster. can say i kpo or sth. link till phylis' frenster. n in her pic, she put up bout 3 to 4 of hew's pic instead of hers. they took lotsa pics together i guess. but as for us, we onli took 3 from wad i noe. first on a 859 on the way to her house, second on the last day of sch n last on prom. all those things i did to her, i was so childish then. so easily influenced. even till now. n i started pushing her out of my life apart from all those fun we had. u cared even though i ignored u. yet i'm glad at least we were back as frenz before u left. at least i'd hav one less regret in this life.

i dunno why things will end up lydat. had i not be so childish in the first place, would things have changed? bwahs.

in fact, she was the first to realli gain my trust out of my circle of frens. she knew mi well though a short time too. i mean if i didnt trust her, i wun even dare to stay over at her house. least she dun say out wad i tell her. the first i stayed over at her house. the first i realli told to bout my mom. guess she took pity on mi too by treatin mi well. lettin mi stay over at her house, eat up her food, dye her hair, play badminton n bball, playin her guitar, using her com, treatin mi to swensens when she didnt hav to, tokin to her mom n dad, suppers, n lots more. she's so like my bf. hahs. but well, maybe all those who treats mi better is cause they noe bout wad happen to my mom. there aint realli such genuine ppl who treats u well because they wan to treat u well. they treat u well is maybe cause of sympathy, pitiness, companion etc. blahs.

overall, i'm juz sad to not be able to see her, tok to her, go her house, sleepovers, stories, bitchin, ur sarcasm, ur smile. i've let u down. n the guilt juz wouldnt go even if u're gone. so sorry. but the least u could do is at least tell us y before u left. i'm overwhelmed.